Cops Discover the Most Horrific Murder of Their Careers

Cops Discover the Most Horrific Murder of Their Careers

“He knows Daddy would never hurt him.”

“I’m hearing voices.”

“I didn’t know you were so you would be upset like that. I thought you were okay.”

This is the last known audio recording of 5-year-old Jack Ponamarenko shortly before one of the most brutal and horrifying child murders Ohio investigators have seen. But when the killer turns out to be the boy’s own father, police must determine why this unthinkable tragedy occurred.

“It’s one of those you’re hoping it’s just one of those, you know. I saw the blood on the wall, I knew it wasn’t.”

“Right, and what did they say?”

“It was Jack.”

The following report is based on official police records released to date, and some of the footage has never been seen before until now. On the afternoon of March 25th, 2021, a disturbing call comes in to 911 in Parma, Ohio.

“911, what’s the address to your emergency? Tell me exactly what happened.”

“I just [clears throat] killed my son.”

“What do you mean you just killed your son?”

“I’m hearing voices.”

“Okay. How old is your son?”

“Six.”

“Where’s your son now?”

“He’s dead.”

“Dead where?”

“In the living room.”

“Do you have any weapons?”

“Can you dispatch cops? [clears throat]”

“We’re doing that now. What’s your name?”

“Matthew Ponamarenko.”

“I have a male subject on the phone saying he killed his 6-year-old son.”

“We’re still getting further from our caller. And you said you hear you’re hearing voices?”

“Yes.”

“All right, how did you kill your son?”

“[sighs] With a baseball bat.”

“You killed him with a baseball bat?”

“Mhm.”

“Everybody responding, just be advised this is now a crime scene.”

“And why did you kill him with a baseball bat?”

“I don’t know.”

With no idea what kind of situation they’re rolling into, Parma police officers arrive ready for anything.

“There’s a male sitting on the front porch.”

“And the two men, two And the two men, two, step it up. The uh male’s covered in blood and PD’s on scene requesting you step it up.”

“Okay, WE’LL VERIFY THAT. YEAH, GET UP FOR ME. And your Keep your hands up in the air. Okay, get out OF THE CAR. HANDS OUT OF YOUR POCKETS.”

“TAKE YOUR HANDS OUT OF YOUR POCKETS.”

“YEP. TASER. ON THE GROUND. GET ON THE GROUND NOW. I GOT LESS LETHAL.”

“HANDS OUT OF YOUR POCKETS.”

“GET DOWN.”

“STOP.”

“YEAH. YEP, WE GOT HIM.”

AS POLICE TAKE 31-year-old Matt Panamaranko into custody, other family members begin getting word that something has happened.

“Something bad. The police just busted into the house on Is there any way you could tell me what is going on? I’m on my way right now.”

“Okay, hold on just a minute. How are you related?”

“I am the grandmother. I guardian. I’ve had him for over two years.”

“Okay, hold on just a minute, okay?”

“Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.”

“Okay, just try to relax. I don’t want you to get in an accident.”

But it’s the fate of her grandson that pushes the officers to face a scene of unforgettable brutality.

“Right in front of the door.”

“It’s the THE FRONT.”

“PARMA POLICE.”

“CHILD DOWN IN LIVING ROOM.”

“OKAY.”

“Jesus Christ. Blood all over the place.”

“I already found it.”

“Oh, there’s a little There’s a kid here. Oh my god. It’s probably not the wall. Yeah, there’s blood all over it.”

“Yeah.”

“SPLATTER.”

“THE TWIST INSIDE. RIGHT. I GOT IT.”

“NO, DON’T GO IN. GO.”

“DON’T GO?”

“NO.”

“NO.”

“NO.”

“OKAY.”

“WELL, we got a kid down in the living room.”

“It doesn’t matter. The kid The kid’s unsaveable.”

“Yeah. Careful where you step.”

“What was her address?”

Police find the walls, floors, and ceiling of the house covered in blood. On the floor is the victim, 5-year-old Jack Ponomarenko. One of the responding officers would later write that his face and skull were crushed to the point that he could not distinguish his facial features.

“Yeah, put him in my”

“You have anything on you, man?”

“No.”

“No. Just face the car, partner.”

Meanwhile, the heartbreaking news is traveling fast.

“Apparently, my son had killed my grandson. I don’t know what to get him, a lawyer. This crime scene, I don’t know what to do, honey. I need a pro to glory just talk me down.”

“We’re going to go ahead and get a hold of a mobile crisis to come talk to you, okay?”

“I’m really feeling bad about it.”

“Okay.”

“I just need you to talk to someone, honey, cuz I’m breaking.”

“I’m here.”

“I know I have a friend over here, but”

“You have a friend”

“I need a professional help. Yeah, yeah, hold on.”

“Yes, I don’t know how much we’re able to release, but it was a looking pretty violent murder, and it it’s on the news ton, Facebook, everyone’s posting about it.”

The singular horror of what happened inside that house is reflected in the ones who saw it with their own eyes.

“The kid’s head is Okay. Completely torn off. You don’t need to go in there. Okay.”

“[sighs]”

“Sorry.”

“I know. I know.”

“I saw my own voice right”

“Talk to me.”

“It’s one of those you’re hoping it’s just one of those, you know?”

“Yep.”

“I saw the boy in the lawn. I knew it wasn’t. I’m just so sensitive to like kid calls and I don’t even know. It’s kidding.”

“diaper dude right”

Police find the instrument of destruction, a 29-in aluminum baseball bat lying beside the victim. Matt himself is transported for medical evaluation and then jail, where one of his first conversations is with his distraught mother.

“Matt.”

“Mom.”

“Matt. Hey. Matt. Oh my god, Matt. Matt. What happened? What [clears throat] happened? Oh. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I know you didn’t. That wasn’t that you, Matt. That wasn’t that you. And that you was the The point is, whatever was controlling you let you do it. You loved that little boy.”

“I don’t. [clears throat]”

“You loved him. You loved him. You were his world. He was your world.”

“I thought this ain’t real.”

“It’s real, Matt.”

“This is real?”

“This is real and it’s the worst real nightmare ever.”

“He’s dead.”

“I know. I know.”

“It’s not okay.”

“I know.”

“I did that.”

“I know.”

“That’s not okay.”

“No, it’s not okay, Matt. But you didn’t do that. Whoever was Whoever did that Do you remember anything?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

Unfortunately for Matt, who turned the home he and his mother share into a blood-soaked murder scene. Investigators want very much to talk about it.

“All right, Matt. Um Do you know why you’re here? Okay. What happened yesterday uh beginning of the day?”

“Um I’ve been out of my mind the last 3 months.”

“Okay.”

“I stopped taking all my medications. The psych ward pulled me off all my medications.”

“Okay. All right.”

“I called my mom about 3 months ago that I wasn’t feeling right.”

Records show that Matt has spent the last few months in and out of counseling centers and treatment facilities.

“I was fine and normal and was I sitting in my room and stuff. You could ask my mom. I was I was like cool. I was like smoking my weed and stuff and I was taking my Suboxone and then it and then as soon as I got off my Suboxone and I got all weird and I just want to get help.”

“I know you do. We’re going to get you the help.”

“[clears throat]”

“You guys aren’t going to help me?”

“Why? Why do you say that?”

“Cuz I’m going to be in prison the rest of my life.”

Getting to the truth of this horrific episode will require not only talking to Matt, but also those who know him best, like Jack’s his maternal grandparents, Janice and John.

“He’s been thrown from his medications left and right.”

“Bipolar?”

“Bipolar, too.”

“Yeah.”

“He’s been in and out of institutions He was released last week from Oaklawn.”

“I guess he’s better when he’s not taking his mom’s open the oxy.”

Discussions of Matt’s psychiatric history also dominate his recorded phone calls from jail.

“Mom woke up at 4:00 a.m. and she heard you talking in the kitchen and she thought you were on the phone cuz she’s like, ‘Who Who the hell’s he talking to at 4:00 a.m.?’ And you were talking to no one at the kitchen sink.”

“Have you ever seen that demon?”

“No.”

“Mhm.”

“No. Not good. Not at all. She loved that little boy. That was That was his life.”

“And he didn’t see this coming at all?”

Following his arrest and tasing, Matt was taken to the hospital for evaluation. While there, he addressed the chilling claim made in the 911 call that he was hearing voices.

“What did the voices ever say?”

“I I don’t I don’t think I was listening.”

“Right. And what did they say?”

“It was kill.”

“And you’ve never tried anything like that before? No.”

“No.”

As far as Matt’s loved ones are concerned, this incident was completely out of his control.

“This is a mental health system failure. You did everything you could to fight. This is the result of cold turkeying you off heavy antipsych medicine.”

“Dude, there’s so much support for you. You have no idea.”

“You serious?”

“Oh my god, Matthew. Yes. You have no clue. It’s not your fault. All right. It just happened. Things happen.”

“You are such a great person and you’re a great daddy and a great son.”

“I’m not any of those things anymore.”

“What’s that?”

“I’m not any of those things anymore.”

“Yes, you are still those things, Matt. You’re still those things. I love you just as much as I did the day you were born. The demon won, okay? However, that demon was not you.”

According to Matt, that inner conflict has been growing more intense in recent years.

“Have you always felt like this? Never. When did you start having kind of like mental issues? About 3 years ago?”

“When I was a little kid.”

“were little?”

His long-term relationship with Sam, Jack’s mother, may have kept the worst of his demons at bay, although she admits she’s seen Matt’s other side.

“She’s always had some mental issues and like his family would always say like I was his like savior. I mean he had an episode before we were out of it together. He jumped out of a four-story building and tried to like a couple months before we started dating. He blamed it on his ex-girlfriend. That’s why he jumped out. Like he was she was driving crazy, blah, blah, blah, and he when he gets into these psychoses, he like feels like he’s floating above his body. He was explaining it to me in a normal state. He was like I’m floating with my body. I have no control of what’s going on. And you can see it in his eyes. He turns”

“And this has happened where you’ve actually you have actually been there when he had one of these?”

“Well, I got woken up to him butt naked in the living room talking about the purge, screaming at the top of his lungs purge sham and stuff, purge, and he was singing the national anthem. So, I tried to take him out of the house and he goes, ‘If you take my son, I’m going to kill you.'”

Police records indicate that Matt was found that night running naked through the neighborhood, leaving his then 2-year-old son in the middle of the road.

“I’m flying down York Road and that I thought it was a dead deer in the road, so I swerved to go out of the way and ran up into a tree line cuz I was going like 50 cuz I was rushed and there was Matt butt naked in the middle laying in the middle of York Road.”

Matt ultimately pled no contest to child endangering after that incident.

“Matt ended up in the cycle ward for three weeks. [clears throat]”

But as both Matt and Sam readily admit, there was more going on than mental illness.

“You love her?”

“Yeah.”

“All right. What happened with that?”

“She got sober and I was um”

“Me and Matt are we were heroin addicts and um he ended up having like knee surgery and I ended up getting a lot of percs and it started there. So, we started using percs again. We were drinking for his birthday and one of his friends was like I can get math and this is where like I first seen math flip side where like kind of what I think happened there this past time when I went in between 2020 that’s when it was like done.”

Over the years Matt received a numerous diagnoses including severe opiate dependence and alcohol dependence. By the time he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in 2019 Sam’s mother was made Jack’s legal guardian but despite the troubles Sam says Matt was always a loving father.

“He loved that little boy even when he was going through manic phases he may have threatened to kill me he may have threatened to he never once ever said anything about Jack. He loved him he protected him he was such a good dad.”

Among Matt’s supporters it’s a common refrain.

“My friend who lives in Minnesota I never even met Matt but she’s like [clears throat] I followed his story and I saw how hard he tried to get help and she said what he did was awful and he even knows that and that’s how he felt she said but that doesn’t define him as a person it was out of his control and she said I’d still trust him with my kids today.”

“Really?”

“Yeah it’s not your fault everyone knows it literally everyone in the world knows this.”

“Well then I shouldn’t get in trouble.”

“I know.”

“I’m a good person.”

“I know you are Matt I know”

“I’ve never done anything wrong in my life. I’m not a killer I’m not a murderer.”

“I know I know.”

“I love my son.”

“I know.”

“I’m not a dad no more.”

“You are still a dad.”

“No I’m not and I’ll never be able to live without him.”

Despite Matt’s insistence that this wasn’t his fault it’s clear that he still feels at least some sense of responsibility.

“Well you got to find a way to find a way to forgive yourself.”

“Well, I can’t.”

“You are going to have to, man. You are going to have to find a way to forgive yourself. You are going to have to find a way to forgive yourself.”

“forgive myself for that. This is This is a special case. This isn’t some bad person did something bad to somebody else. This is This is different. This is different. Everybody loves you.”

Indeed, the extent of the support is at times almost surprising.

“No matter what you did, it wasn’t you, brother. Forget over it. It’s a little bump in the road. Excuse my French. It’s a bump in the road. You loved him. You would never do that. You just snapped. That’s it. Big deal.”

But for the detective, that answer isn’t going to suffice.

“Matt, can you tell me what the what happened yesterday? Matt, do you remember calling 911?”

“No.”

“What what happened in that house?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know or you don’t know? Do you have anything in your in Do you picture anything?”

“head? No. I’m just emotionless. I’m just nothing.”

“Okay. If I played you the 911 recording, do you think it would help you remember?”

“Yeah.”

“I just killed my son.”

“What do you mean you just killed your son?”

“I’m hearing voices.”

“Oh, okay. How old is your son?”

“Do you remember that, Matt? Do you remember making that call?”

“You can tell you were still listening to the voices. Cuz you’re saying, Matt.”

“How would you expect to listen to it?”

“Because it’s public record. Of course it got released. Really, you defended your truth even in the call. You know what I’m saying? That’s the first thing you said.”

“Yeah.”

“And you said, ‘I’m hearing voices.’ And then you’re bleeding really really heavy. And then And then she’s saying, ‘You said you heard voices.’ And you’re like, ‘Yes.’ And then she’s going, ‘Matt. Matt.’ And you’re not responding.”

“When did you kill your son? Matt?”

“Yeah.”

“When did this happen?”

“I’m shaken.”

“I understand. When did this happen?”

“Yeah.”

“When did this happen? Matt, you still there with me? Matt?”

“If you did it maliciously, why would you even call for help?”

“No.”

“Why wouldn’t you run? You know what I’m saying?”

“Do you remember the police coming to your house yesterday?”

“Yeah, I remember the I remember the cops were there.”

“Okay. What happened when the cops got there?”

“They shot a lot of them.”

“Okay. And what happened?”

“Uh I got tased or Yeah.”

“Okay.”

“Tased.”

“So, you got tased yesterday? Okay. Why did you get tased?”

“Cuz I I I was putting my hand in my pocket.”

“Matt, HANDS OUT OF YOUR POCKET.”

“YOU REALLY JUST LEAVE IT OUTSIDE FOR HELP. I don’t understand why you got tased. You didn’t resist arrest. You know, I know they were scared, but you don’t tase someone. Just put your gun down if you’re afraid. Just don’t use it, you know?”

“Yeah.”

But, the detective wants to know what happened before police were called in the hours where Matt was trusted to stay home alone with his son.

“Do you remember um James dropping J?”

“No.”

“He dropped off with Matt.”

“Okay. And uh Russell had dropped him about uh about noon.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. Uh I had a uh therapy appointment at 1:45. Okay. So, when you when you went to uh drop J off, Matt was already outside in the front yard. Was he inside?”

“Yeah, he was sitting outside.”

“He was outside. Okay. And his demeanor [clears throat] was”

“He seemed fine.”

“Seemed fine.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay.”

“Like I said, he got out of the car, got out of the car, and talked to”

Janice says she detected nothing strange about her interaction with Matt until later.

“And I asked Matt, you know, how you how he’s doing. He said he’s doing great. And then I said um you know, cream about Did they give you more than the boxes? And he said yes, they did. So, I figured he received a package today. But it comes to my doubt from his mom that he lied to me.”

“Well, Tuesday morning you missed your doctor’s appointment and you were really confused. So, you told Mommy Mr. Uber and then you told me you didn’t go and you didn’t know why and you told Janice you went.”

“Were you having these thoughts, Matt? Were you having these thoughts before Janice dropped him off?”

“No. No.”

That day, Jax, who was diagnosed as non-verbal autistic, had an appointment with a behavioral therapist.

“We are trying to improve his speech.”

“Do they specialize in autism? Is that Okay.”

“Just a few months ago we got him It’s like a speech generating device. So, it’s an iPad that has”

“I I’ve known him like three or four of those.”

“Yeah. They’re awesome. And it’s like he had the word, but that was just extra and then like say that I want chips, he’d be like chips after. I’m like, ‘Sweet, you know.’ There was only an hour and a half before the therapist was going to get there.”

“Do you remember you you texted Jack one um therapist and you told her to, you know, you know, don’t don’t bother coming today, you know, I’m just sick as Do you remember giving her a a text that said that?”

“No.”

“No? Well, you sent that you sent that text at 12:38. Janice dropped off at 12:00 and left you at about 12:10. So, in between that we’re talking about what, 28 minutes? In that 28 minutes, I don’t know, you know, wondering what happened in that home. [clears throat]”

“I need to go to the psych ward.”

“You need to go to the psych ward?”

“Yes.”

“Do you remember anything in that 28 minutes?”

“I just remember that feeling, right?”

“Matt, important question. Look at me. Did this happen before or after you canceled the appointment with Jacqueline?”

“After.”

“It happened after you canceled with Jacqueline? So, why did you cancel with Jacqueline?”

“I wasn’t feeling good.”

“And then he texted me at 12:38 and said, ‘You don’t have to come. I’m sick.’ So, he said, um, he tried calling me at 12:56 and the iPhone cuts off your voicemail at like 3 minutes. So, it ended up just hanging up on him.”

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.”

“Yeah. And I can hear Jax in the background, so I know he was alive at that time.”

“Okay. What happened to him?”

“Yeah.”

In the unintentional call, Jax can be heard playing in the background. There’s absolutely no indication that he has less than an hour to live. This inadvertent voicemail ends up being the last recording of Jax alive.

“Did you guys play any games or anything like that? I noticed he had a he had a tablet I have had um, that he was using.”

“He told me to go get his tablets.”

“Okay. Were you working on the tablet with him at all?”

“Playing with him. Okay. I’ve never been a violent person in my life.”

But investigators have to square this statement with a crime scene so appalling that puddles of blood were found in the basement having leaked through the floor.

“We already forgave you because we know that maybe your hands did that but your mind did not do that, okay? Not like one day you woke up and didn’t didn’t the door jam anymore. That’s not the case.”

“No, not at all.”

“You did not feel a little boy in those moments. You was only answering that thing in your head. But I know that’s hard for you.”

But whether in calls with his family or in a formal interview, when the subject turns to exactly what happened in those moments, Matthew himself is silent.

“Matt, where was the bat at? Did Did it start upstairs in the upper second floor?”

“What?”

“Whatever happened with you and Jax in the house.”

“We were just hanging out.”

“Yeah. And and what? What happened after that?”

“[snorts] I need help.”

“I know.”

“I I don’t think it was his fault.”

“You know, he’s been in the psych ward”

“Mhm.”

“three times because he wanted to die, wanted to die. I’m just going like just going manic, you know, and telling his mom that he’s you know, I’m hearing things and you know, whatever.”

“How recent are these events?”

“Within the last two months, three months and um and then they keep releasing him. They keep him for three days and he literally begged Oak Field, begged Oak Field, if you let me out, I’m going to hurt myself, I’m going to hurt somebody.”

According to records from his recent overdose hospitalization, Matt denied having violent ideations of any kind. Upon discharge, doctors described him as hopeful and future oriented and at minimal risk of harming others. Jaxs was murdered just eight days later.

“Matt, where was the bat at? Did you have to go get it in the garage? You did? What else?”

“Go through it and what else? What happened? Go through it.”

“You know what happened.”

“Tell me what happened. I want you to know. I want to know that you know.”

“I didn’t mean to do it.”

“Okay.”

“I really didn’t.”

“I believe you. I know you didn’t. Nobody would. Walk me through it. We’ll do it real quick and be done with it.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Well, there’s a little bit to talk about. Okay? I know you didn’t mean to do it. You went back in the house. Did you have the bat with you when you went back in the house? And then what?”

“I’m not talking about it.”

And with this gap in the record, not everyone is convinced that Matthew is as blameless as he claims.

“I don’t know I don’t know if he heard voices or anything. I have my doubts. But, I don’t know if he did.”

“What do you mean?”

“They What do you think? He planned it? Like he knew he was going to do?”

Some have even begun to speculate on a potential motive.

“Was he abusive at all to you?”

“Oh god, Matt was like nothing obsessive with me. He was in love with me. In love in love in love with me.”

“I do wake up saying that we needed to try to get Sammy away from Matt because we thought Matt was just a bad influence.”

“Bad influence.”

“No, I never talked to him since the first time when he found out I had a girlfriend.”

“Okay. And when was that?”

“Right before he went to Matt’s house. It was a couple months ago, 2 months ago.”

In his calls with Sam, Matt mourns what they once had.

“You used to be my best friend.”

“Yeah. Stop.”

“What?”

“I’m I’m still here for you. I told you even through all of that dude, I I still hope at some point we could still be best friends. Do you understand that?”

“Well, I don’t know. You kind of like threw me away like I was nothing.”

“Yeah, I had to try to keep myself okay.”

“And I I know you made texts that were really crazy to me.”

“Like what?”

“Saying that uh if he can ever be happy, want to be with us anymore and all of this stuff.”

“Do you blame Matt for killing him?”

“Yes.”

“Yes. Yes.”

“Do you blame his mental illness or do you blame Matt?”

“I mean, when it first happened, I was all about how about the mental illness part of it and the medicine, but like I said, after talking to Janet last night and her putting it in perspective of the only reason I hurt Sam is to take her son.”

“Mhm.”

“I feel like it was him.”

As much as that theory might make sense of this utterly senseless act, it may not be so simple.

“Can I ask you something man to man? Did it have anything to do with Samantha and her new girlfriend?”

“No.”

“No. You were aware of that relationship?”

“Mhm.”

“Did that make you mad at all?”

“It didn’t make me mad.”

“This didn’t have anything to do with Samantha?”

“No.”

“No. Okay. [clears throat] Were you mad at anybody?”

“No.”

“When did you know you were going to do what you were going to do?”

“I didn’t know.”

“Okay. I mean, was it the exact moment it happened? Was it almost like I can’t even believe I’m doing this sort of thing?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you just walk right up to him and do it?”

“I don’t know. That’s how I feel about it.”

In an interview with a forensic psychiatrist, Matt said of that day, “I was pretending that I was okay, as if I’m not hearing voices, sitting upstairs with him, crying, asking God to make this stop. Voices told me to kill him and go downstairs and grab a circular saw and cut my head off. I guess I grabbed a bat and went inside and killed him.”

“I wish I would have told you guys to drive me to the hospital.”

“I wish you would have told me that, too. I would have driven you.”

“I didn’t want to ask for more help cuz I thought you guys were mad at me.”

“Oh my gosh, Matt, not ever. You felt like that that morning when I left?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, Matt, why did you just not ask?”

“Because thought you guys were sick of me.”

“My god, Matt, not ever, not ever, not ever. I told you I would stay if you needed me, if you were okay. Like well, I didn’t ask you. I said, ‘Are you okay to stay home with today?’ And you said, ‘Yeah, I’m fine.’ And so What is the right way to feel in the same area? How do we all live with that now?”

“You don’t think I have regrets. I didn’t say anything to my mom. I should have known better. You know, we knew you weren’t you know, I should have said something, but I didn’t speak up. And we know you you know, we know you loved him so much. So, [snorts] we just didn’t think anything.”

“What were you going to say to her?”

“Calling her maybe it wasn’t a good idea, you know? Oh, especially if your mom wasn’t there. It wasn’t a good idea. And I thought something that morning. I said, ‘Damn, I just don’t feel comfortable.’ And I didn’t speak up cuz I didn’t feel like his mom anymore. I felt like my mom was more of his mom than I was.”

“Uh-huh.”

“And I didn’t speak up.”

“Dick. Who dropped you off? I’m going to what? I’m going to take her out to ice cream parlor place. And I don’t want to talk over the phone cuz everything’s being recorded. And I don’t give a The thing is, how come that dropped you off? That’s child endangerment.”

“I would have I would have I would have not I don’t know. I would have never”

“I know. I I know. Believe me, I know.”

“He just told me”

“Yeah, it’s not your fault. It’s not.”

With his family worrying over signs they may have missed that day, a man Matt knew from a past rehab stint says the signs started a lot earlier than that.

“So, while we’re walking, he’s smoking a cigarette, and he’s telling me about his son. And I’m like, ‘What’s wrong with him?’ And he’s like, ‘You know, he has some issues.’ He was like, ‘I would rather see him dead than to suffer.’ I said, ‘What?’ I was like, ‘What the make you say something like that, man? Like Like that’s your son.’ He was like, ‘Oh, no, never mind, man.’ He was like, ‘You know, I’m just frustrated and a little bit angry.’ He was like, ‘You know, I didn’t I didn’t mean to say that.'”

Another resident of the facility confirms the story.

“So I’m going to kill my son cuz he’s autistic and Everyone [clears throat] was like, ‘That ain’t cool, you know?’ Like”

“Mhm.”

“Why you say like that?”

“He talked about killing his son. Why?”

“Cuz he was autistic and it put a damper on his life.”

“Put a damper on whose life?”

“On Matthew’s.”

“Okay.”

“I heard that I don’t know who I’m calling. Just ate me alive, man. I just killed my son. How did you do that? I beat him, put him to bed. He always told us he was going to beat him or choke him to death.”

“He said he was going to beat him or choke him to death?”

“Mhm. Cuz it would just come up out of nowhere. Like my son needs to die. Like what the Where did that come from, dude?”

The other resident who also knew Matt outside the facility says he didn’t find him to be the warm, loving father that others describe.

“He never really talked to his son.”

“Okay.”

“At all. Like when he was drinking, like I say, if the baby was in the yard playing around, running around the yard and crawling in the grass, like he he never he just didn’t like he didn’t interact with him at all. I still see his face. That too. [snorts]”

“All right.”

“Matt, can you tell me if was was doing anything that annoyed you yesterday for”

“No, never. Never in my life.”

“What would Jack say about you?”

“Love me.”

“He did?”

“Yeah. I have no doubt no doubt he did. No doubt.”

“Sometimes things just happen where you lose all control. Is that what happened yesterday?”

“What?”

“Did you just lose control?”

“No.”

“No?”

Jaxon’s autopsy describes a 9 and 1/2 inch gaping laceration of his face along with severe crush type fractures of the facial bones and skull. His brain is noted to have suffered extensive injury including pulpification of the various lobes.

“It it it it was hard. It was the”

“Yeah.”

“The hardest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“I’m praying every day.”

“What are you praying for?”

“I’m praying that God will have mercy on your soul.”

“It’s okay, Matt.”

“No, it’s not.”

“It’s okay to let it out.”

“No, it’s not.”

“You can do it. It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay.”

“It’s okay to talk about it now. I know. I know. I know you’re a good dad, okay? That’s not the issue. It’s not the issue. I know you loved him very much. Something happened.”

“No, I just went feel crazy.”

“I know. I know. I know. Can’t talk about it? Can’t talk about it? Is it just too hard to talk about it?”

“I just can’t. [clears throat]”

“Tell me why you can’t talk about it. Why is it just too hard for you at this point or you just don’t want to? What?”

“It’s just just too tough.”

“All right. This is your last chance, Matt. What’s the question? Why?”

“I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.”

And in the end, there is no one else who can fill in that blank.

“I mean, if anything, like if he’s in a mental institution for a very long time, as long as like I don’t know, twice a couple of years. I’d rather he’s in that or he comes back out in a long time knowing he’s stable, you know? Obviously, he’s not a bad thing for society. That’s like the point.”

“You don’t [clears throat] think he’s a bad thing for society?”

“Right now, I don’t know. I’ve seen switch. I’ve seen you go from Dr. to Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, you know, I’ve seen it. There’s literally people are like, ‘Oh, you know, you you should have control of that.’ No, it’s not like that.”

“Matt, what do you think should happen to you?”

“I’ll never be relaxed. Not like in cars or anything. I want to be sentenced to life in prison.”

Even so, his hopes for that option are not high.

“How long do I have in prison?”

“I don’t know.”

“I wish I could die.”

“I know you can’t. I know.”

“I wish I could die.”

“I know you can’t.”

“I feel like they’re going to kill me in there anyways.”

“Oh, Matt, don’t say that.”

“They see who I am.”

“No, don’t say that.”

“I’m going to get murdered. Yeah.”

“Yeah. You got to do what’s what you need to do for you, Matt, okay? I’m telling you that.”

“What do you mean?”

“At any point you can’t handle something, I don’t know.”

“I shouldn’t have loved her.”

“I know. I know you do, Matt.”

In November 2023, Matthew Panu Marenko pled guilty to aggravated murder, kidnapping, and endangering children. At his sentencing hearing, he yelled out, “Get this over with so I can go drink my coffee.” He was given an aggregate sentence of life in prison with parole eligibility after 45 years.

“I’m going to die anyway. Love you.”

“I know you don’t want to do that, Matt. [laughter]”

“I have to. I’m sorry.”

“I know you don’t mean that. I don’t want you to do that, darling.”

In the months after his arrest, Matt’s mother seemed to struggle to give him advice on what to do, whether it be to hang on or to let go.

“Matt, if you can’t hold on, I already told you, you know what you need to do, and you know what you need to do before that. Make peace with God, make peace with and I will see you in heaven.”

A few years later, Matt would make his own choice. Guards at the Correctional Reception Center in Orient, Ohio found him lying dead in his cell on December 7th, 2025. He was 36 years old. In an online memorial for 5-year-old Jax Ponomarenko, his family wrote, “My baby boy, my little man. I don’t know how or when, but one day I’ll see you and feel whole again.”